Sixteen years ago I held a newborn in my arms. She looked so tiny all wrapped in a pink towel.

Now 16 years later she tells me how she is growing. She stands next to me and with her hand going up on an angle tries to convince me that she is taller than I am.

Sixteen years ago we faced medical uncertainties, surgeries, and the fear that she would not live. It was after complication after a heart catheterization that the NICU doctor looked at us and told us, “prepare yourself, she is not going to make it.”

My response to the doctor was, “Tā zài shàngdì de shǒuzhōng” meaning “She is in God’s Hands.” As I walked out of the NICU at the end of visiting hours that night, that was the only place I could put her, In God’s hands.

Sixteen years later, this time it was me sitting in a hospital room. Trying to determine the source of my fevers. Even though I am in the hospital, we are able to communicate via text messaging.

The messages are about her birthday that is just days away. She wants to know if I will be home for her birthday. I hope so but I have been in longer than I planned. She wants to know who will make her birthday pancakes.

I was uncertain of what I could do. Now I was dealing with medical uncertainties, what was causing repeated fevers?

I again realized that the best place for her is In God’s Hands. 

I have learned there is a limit to what I can do as a mum but there is no limit to what God can do.

While I love her lots and lots, God loves her even more. He shows his love for her in so many ways.

I want to protect her and keep her safe but God is able to do a much better job of that.

As she transitions to new things the best place for her is In God’s Hands. 

Miss K finishes at the local secondary school this year and that means moving to a post-16 program. Together we have chosen a college (the term used for a school that covers the last two years of school) where she will continue working on life skills and work training. As I let go a bit it means placing her In God’s Hands.

We have been so thankful to have a Children’s Hospital just 12 minutes away. Now as she turns 16 we are transitioning to adult services.

There is joy in placing her In God’s Hands.

Miss K loves life, chocolate, dancing, people, and cake. At least once a day we hear, “It’s my favourite.”

Miss K loves God and listening to her pray for others is a blessing. She has an understanding of who God is and what he is able to do.

Her love for people touches so many in ways that only she can do.

 

Happy 16th birthday to my daughter who has taught me so much in these past sixteen years. I have learned so much about God.

Sixteen years ago we were uncertain of so many things – would Miss K survive open-heart surgery, would we be able to continue living and ministering overseas, how would she develop. God has been with us comforting and guiding through each step.

I am thankful through the years for people that have loved Miss K. There are people who have invested in her, spent time with her, listened to her, talked with her, and just sat with her. Thank you.

Happy 16th Birthday!

 

I am currently writing a memoir reflecting on raising a special needs child overseas. You can help me by commenting on the blog posts and following my blogger. It helps a publisher to know that there are people that want to read the book. So please leave a comment and follow my blog. Thank you.